An Unlit candle

This series takes readers inside the mind of non-essential workers who were furloughed from their jobs and ordered to stay at home during the Covid-19 pandemic. 

Ever bought candles and never lit them? It seems a good idea, admiring and absorbing the scents and colors without smoke. Eventually though, the scent will end and cleaning gooey dusty candle tops is something you bitch about.

No matter which you are, by definition, candles are blocks of wax with a wick, lit for light as it burns away. If never lit, what is the purpose of your candles?

Over the years I've used candles for utility and convenience. Whether producing light after losing electricity from hurricanes and winter storms or exploiting their ambiance around an active waterbed, candles are essential.

I grew up with utility candles in the junk drawer. Certain that some of those old trusty fire sticks made their way to my first apartment and saved me a few times, I was determined to keep them on a registry list if I were ever to get married.

Decades later, candles are spiritual guiders when contemplation is needed. The light reminds us to shine. The warmth emits a sense of safeness, yet the flames keep us in check. An appreciated balance.

Mindful of the recent summons for non-essential-ers to stay at home, I try keeping busy with a new get more organized routine, so I clean. Concurrently, a trek of non-lighting has me bitching about gooey dusty candle tops. I'm disappointed for destroying its purpose, I feel defeated. Between cabin fever and mind-wandering, ridding dust bunnies is now on the back burner, and apparently rational thinking has left the building.

Boredom set in a while ago.

After weeks obeying orders, my purpose may be damaged. I lost the meaning of lit candles, so why bother.

By May 1, schemas twirled inside my head, the laziness of seven weeks furloughed has me indecisive. Do I dare risk being caught for escaping the stay-at-home restrictions to fetch a purposeful new candle?

I've read on Facebook some grocery workers give the stink eye to nonchalant shoppers like me. Candles are one of my essentials, certainly for many others too.

Is my scarf-mask already in the car?

Settling the guilt trip safer-at-home argument between the voices inside my head, I put Clorox wipes on the list. It was tough disregarding knowledge of the empty cleaning items shelves.

 On the DL long enough, my brain is mush, outside looks different and I want- out. 

 Outside is different. Plenty of cars on the road. I saw a solo jogger wearing a mask. How awkward he looked. My face started to itch so I pulled over to add hydrocortisone cream to the list of essentials.